October 13, 2011
Top Ten Reasons Why Mad Tea Partiers Aren't Even the Least Little Bit Like "Occupy" Fill-In-the-Blankers
- Tea partiers want the poor to emulate the rich; Occupiers want the poor to eat the rich.
- Tea partiers want limited government to create a limitless future; Occupiers: "Strike that, reverse it!"
- Tea partiers get exhilarated by the unsullied wilderness of the United States; Occupiers get a tingle from the unsanitary wilderness of Zucchini Park.
- Tea partiers look at the federal government and are sore as hell; Occupiers look at the federal government and hail Soros.
- Occupiers chant "Solidarity forever!" Tea partiers chant "solvency forever!"
- Tea partiers want to free the American economy; Occupiers want the American economy -- for free.
- Tea partiers believe in great American exceptionalism; Occupiers take great exception to America.
- Tea partiers' favorite book is the Federalist Papers; Occupiers' favorite book is Where the Wild Things Are... which they think is a guide to spring-break in Daytona Beach.
- Occupiers think "grass roots" can be rolled and smoked.
- The dirty, smelly, hippies "occupying" Zamboni Park are adored by the Teamsters. (Who knew?)
- Tea partiers demand an end to insane, trillion-dollar deficits; Occupiers have a trillion insane demands.
- Tea partiers know what the word "job" means without having to look it up in the Devil's Dictonary.
And the number-one reason why mad tea partiers aren't even the least little bit like "Occupy" fill-in-the-blankers...
- Say what you will about tea partiers, their personal hygeine is impeccable.
(Do I exceed my parameters? Very well then, I exceed my parameters, I am large, I contain multitudes.)
Hatched by Dafydd on this day, October 13, 2011, at the time of 1:04 PM
Comments
The following hissed in response by: GW
Lol . . . . even though this may be very low hanging fruit indeed, you have done a superbly in articulating the differences. Exceptionalism v. exception had me spitting coffee on the keyboard.
The above hissed in response by: GW ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://biglizards.net/blog/nav-commenters.gif)
at October 14, 2011 12:08 PM
The following hissed in response by: GW
Lol . . . . even though this may be very low hanging fruit indeed, you have done a superbly in articulating the differences. Exceptionalism v. exception had me spitting coffee on the keyboard.
The above hissed in response by: GW at October 14, 2011 12:08 PM
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