October 31, 2007

Hajj Podge

Hatched by Dafydd

Hajj is the pilgrimage all good Moslems must undertake during the lunar month of Dhu’l Hijja, sometime during their lives. The journey to Mecca is the fifth of the five pillars of Islam, after professing that there is no God but God, and Mohammed is His prophet; praying five times every day; giving charity to the poor; and fasting during Ramadan.

Every year, millions of the faithful travel to Mecca, walk seven times around the Kabah and sacrifice an animal to God, in honor of the patriarch Ibrahim.

And every year, it seems that brainless Hollywood weirdos must perform their own Hajj to the America-hating dictator du jour.

The most recent pilgrim is 37 year old "supermodel" and violent harridan Naomi Campbell; and the hip, young guru who is the object of Miss Naomi's spirit journey is our old friend Hugo Chavez of the soon to be hellhole Venezuela. Miss Naomi follows in the footsteps of other seekers and disciples, including Sean Penn, Kevin Spacey, Harry Bellafonte, and Danny Glover... names to conjure with, to be sure.

As a camp follower of Hugo Chavez, Miss Naomi is a natural, as you can see here. They go together like ham and fist, and rumor has it Miss Naomi will audition for the role of Che in the Caracas production of Evita.

According to a confidential Democratic memo that was accidentally left behind at the Midnight Special bookstore in Los Angeles, Mr. Chavez will give the keynote speech at the 2008 Democratic National Mirror-Convention in La Paz, Bolivia; Chavez will be introduced by his fiancé, Evo Morales, president of Bolivia.

La Paz, at 11,811 feet, has been declared the sister city of Denver, Colorado, where the normal Democratic convention will be held. Denver itself has petitioned the state of Colorado to permanently change its name to Demver in honor of the occasion.

Miss Naomi will take a holiday from the rigorous production schedule in Caracas of eight performances per day (every other Monday to be dark) in order to be present when Chavez and Morales read the wedding banns in La Paz, and she has agreed to be Chavez's best man; Morales has chosen Heather Mills as his.

The author solemnly warrants that there is no joke or subtle meaning in the publisher's imprint.

Hatched by Dafydd on this day, October 31, 2007, at the time of 4:43 AM

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The following hissed in response by: Fritz

Hummm, I wonder if the budget for the movie will be big enough to allow for a few testosterone shots so Naomi can grow a proper beard? I know Hollywood thinks it does well with fake beards, but unfortunately thinks about describes it most of the time.
On a somewhat more serious note, it is a shame that people like Naomi and Bellafonte can't be forced to live under the rule of the people they hold in such veneration.

The above hissed in response by: Fritz [TypeKey Profile Page] at October 31, 2007 6:54 AM

The following hissed in response by: David M

The Thunder Run has linked to this post in the - Web Reconnaissance for 10/31/2007 A short recon of what’s out there that might draw your attention, updated throughout the day...so check back often.

The above hissed in response by: David M [TypeKey Profile Page] at October 31, 2007 8:35 AM

The following hissed in response by: soccerdad

Ya gotta admit from Hugo's standpoint, she's quite a step up from Cindy!

The above hissed in response by: soccerdad [TypeKey Profile Page] at October 31, 2007 11:10 AM

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